When I first left the Mormon church (mentally and emotionally, at any rate, even if circumstances compel me to still attend)¹, I found myself rebelling against anything of a spiritual nature. Whenever others would pray or do other similar “spiritual” things, I would go into extra-logical atheist mode, shielding myself inside my little bubble. It was sort of a knee-jerk reaction against all things Mormon.

I realized fairly quickly that this was not making me happy. I came to understand that there were all these sorts of “spiritual” things that did improve my life. You can call them prayer, meditation, contemplating the divine, spiritualism—whatever you want.

You know those good feelings we all felt that we called the Holy Ghost? We all eventually realized that those feelings don’t necessarily imply the truth of Mormonism, or particular doctrinal points, or whatever it is they come in conjunction with. That was one of the biggest things that led me away from the church—realizing that everyone, regardless of whether they’re Mormon or not, regardless of whether they’re even Christian or not, have these feelings. But at realizing this, I immediately abandoned all these feelings.

But the key phrase is “good feelings”. Just because they don’t imply truth doesn’t make them any less “good-feeling”. Now I realize that these feelings are a powerful tool in my life, that they can be utilized to make me happier. So I find myself “feeling the Holy Ghost” [for lack of a better phrase] more and more often. I even pray when it makes me feel good. I’m still an atheist; I have no evidence that anything is really “up there”. But I find I can take advantage of these things for my own benefit. (Even though *chuckle* my lifestyle isn’t what TBM’s would think allows me to feel any such spirit. And just last week, we had a talk in church about how feeling the spirit means you’re guaranteed a spot in the CK!)

As others have pointed out, love is certainly scientific. We can read evolutionary biology to tell us why we love; we can measure chemicals and hormones in the brain that influence us to act in certain ways. But to me, all this says is that love is a huge waste of time, a lie forced onto us by natural selection as surely as the Mormon church forced the Holy Ghost onto us. All evolution “wants” is for us to maximize our surviving grandchildren and propagate our genes as much as possible. Once birth control enters the picture, as far as evolution is concerned sex is merely a huge waste of time, energy, and resources.

And yet, we still love. We still make love. Why?

Because it makes us happier. It makes me happier, anyway.

So, I pose a question to you all [although mostly to the atheists/agnostics]: what “spiritual” devices do you still employ, in whatever form that suits you best, even after leaving the Mormon church? Do you pray? Do you consciously try to “feel the spirit”? Do you meditate? Do you use other things that are usually considered “religious” simply because they make you feel good? Or do you think that’s “selling out our rationality for cheap religious thrills” so to speak?

I’m highly interested in what you all have to say.